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26 November 2012 @ 11:19 am
Sherlock: Blood and Bow Ties  
Title: Blood and Bow Ties
Characters: John, Stamford, Lestrade, Sherlock
Rating: G
Warnings: none, except for a brief mention of blood
Spoilers: none
Pairings: technically John/Unspecified Future Spouse, but pretty much Gen as she (or he!) is unmentioned.
Word count: Approx. 600
Summary: John is getting married. Sherlock Holmes is missing.
Author's notes: This is a silly little thing that popped into my head as I was falling asleep and so I've written it. It is fluffy.

I couldn't decide if John would be married in his uniform or not. There is a version of mess kit that has a bow tie, however, so feel free to presume what you want.

“How much time do we have left?” John asked.

Stamford obligingly looked at his watch, even though John was aware he'd asked the question five times already. “Ten minutes,” he said. “It will be fine, John. They'll be here.”

Stamford was currently his only usher. John was currently missing the other one and his Best Man, Lestrade having gone to try and hunt down Sherlock. Neither were answering their mobiles. John hoped this was because they were running too fast toward the church to respond.

“It's a good thing I gave the rings to you,” John noted.

Stamford, taking the hint, pulled the rings from his pocket and flashed them in reassurance. “I have a back-up Best Man speech, too,” he admitted.

John couldn't help but laugh at that. “I might make you use it, even if Sherlock does show-up,” he said. “God knows what he's come up with—if he's even come up with anything. Every time I've asked he'd just swatted at me and told me in it's in his mind place and was perfectly suitable. I really think it should be vetted. I still don't think this bow tie is right...”

“You're babbling,” Stamford said. “You nervous?”

“Yes,” John admitted. “I can't feel my feet.” He gave them a few shakes, making Stamford chuckle.”How much time do we have left?”

“Eight minutes,” Stamford said, without looking at his watch. “They'll be here.”

“They bloody well better be,” John muttered.

“I have him! He's here, it's okay,” Lestrade said, bursting in three minutes to the ceremony's scheduled start time. He was literally pulling Sherlock by the arm.

“Where the hell—?” John began. “Are you bleeding? Please tell me you did not get yourself stabbed on my wedding day.”

“It's not mine. It's fine, my waistcoat will cover the blood,” Sherlock assured him. “My cuff links are in my pocket and—your bow tie looks ridiculous.”

John didn't have time to yell. It was a three-man job to get Sherlock looking presentable. His waistcoat did cover the blood on his shirt and Stamford buffed shoes with a will and Lestrade brushed his jacket out and Sherlock was transformed into something like a Best Man in three minutes flat.

“See, I told you it would be fine,” Sherlock said, unperturbed. “I will have to leave directly after the ceremony though.”

“Dinner,” John argued.

“First dance,” Sherlock bartered.

“Speeches,” John said.

Sherlock narrowed his eyes. “Deal,” he agreed.

“And please don't make the Maid of Honour cry like you did at the rehearsal,” John said.

“You told me to make small talk!” Sherlock said. “I was trying to comply.”

“Yeah, 'I hope you allowed for your recent weight gain when you had your dressed fitted' does not count as small talk,” John said. “Don't say anything to her. Just smile.” Sherlock put on a purely fake smile. “Okay, don't frown. Just don't frown.”

“Show time,” Lestrade said. “C'mon, John.”

“Wait, wait,” Sherlock said.

“Sherlock!” John complained.

“I can't in good conscience let you get married like this,” Sherlock announced.

There was dead silence in the room. John felt his stomach turn cold. He thought they'd moved past the childish refusal and into reluctant acceptance.

“Your bow tie is atrocious,” Sherlock said. “I'm not standing next to you looking like that. Here.”

John relaxed and laughed, putting his hands up to let Sherlock retie it. He glanced in the mirror and had to admit it was better now.

“Okay, go ahead,” Sherlock said.

“Thank you,” John said, and meant it.

Sherlock Holmes might be the worst Best Man in history and sometimes vied for the worst best friend, but when it mattered, he could be counted on.

And he could tie one hell of a bow tie.
shadowfireflame: Sherlockshadowfireflame on November 26th, 2012 07:12 pm (UTC)
Ohhh, this was so cute! Glad they got there on time--right to the very second. :)

I'm dying to know what Sherlock was doing that he got blood all over him...
The Writer They Call Tay: SHERLOCK: Sherlock cameoawanderingbard on November 29th, 2012 04:36 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it.

As for the blood, I picture him at a crime scene, carrying his clothes for the wedding and handing them off to a poor constable who accidentally drags them through something. Or Sherlock being so eager to view a clue, he leans a little bit too close to the body and gets stained.

Thanks for commenting!
The other Weird Alaeron_lanart on November 26th, 2012 08:45 pm (UTC)
Love this. Typical Sherlock to not be there, and typical of Greg to find him, though I want to know how the blood got there and all. Made me smile that Stamford had a back up speech all ready.
The Writer They Call Tay: SHERLOCK: Sherlock shockawanderingbard on November 29th, 2012 04:36 pm (UTC)
Hmmm, I might have to write the adventures of Lestrade wrangling Sherlock. People seem interested in the blood. ;-D

Thanks for commenting! I'm glad you enjoyed the story.
donutsweeperdonutsweeper on November 27th, 2012 02:59 am (UTC)
The Writer They Call Tay: SHERLOCK: Mrs Hudson hugglesawanderingbard on November 29th, 2012 04:37 pm (UTC)
_medley_: blanket fort by rustydog_medley_ on November 27th, 2012 03:15 am (UTC)
I read this on my lunch break today and it was JUST what I needed, so thank you for that! (Work is insane and likely to stay that way this week.) Love the back-up best man speech and Lestrade going to get Sherlock and every bit of dialogue between John and Sherlock.
The Writer They Call Tay: SHERLOCK: Watson giggleawanderingbard on November 29th, 2012 04:38 pm (UTC)
I'm glad to be of service, ma'am! I'm pleased you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading and commenting! I always like seeing you pop up on my entries. :D Hope your week looks up soon!
aelfgyfu_mead: John Watsonaelfgyfu_mead on November 27th, 2012 03:16 am (UTC)
Aw! Sherlock would come through in the end. I know he would. But he'd make John worry.
The Writer They Call Tay: SHERLOCK: Watson giggleawanderingbard on November 29th, 2012 04:39 pm (UTC)
Hehe. He wouldn't be Sherlock if he made things easy. Thanks for commenting! :-)
Ariane DeVerearianedevere on November 27th, 2012 04:34 pm (UTC)
This is totally gorgeous even though it's just wrong that John isn't marrying Sherlock! Sherlock's 'small talk' to the Maid of Honour is classic, and so very Sherlock.

And the last line is just perfect.
The Writer They Call Tay: SHERLOCK: Sherlock shockawanderingbard on November 29th, 2012 04:40 pm (UTC)
Hehe! I'm one of those rare people who doesn't really ship anyone. I appreciate you reading, even though it's not your pairing. Thanks for commenting, as well! I'm glad you enjoyed it.
(Deleted comment)
The Writer They Call Tay: SHERLOCK: Sherlock shockawanderingbard on November 29th, 2012 04:40 pm (UTC)
Thanks very much!
Strictly Ornamental: sherlockdaasgrrl on November 27th, 2012 11:40 pm (UTC)
I am so full of awww :)
The Writer They Call Tay: SHERLOCK: Mrs Hudson hugglesawanderingbard on November 29th, 2012 04:41 pm (UTC)
Aww, I'm please. Thanks for commenting!
221b_hound221b_hound on November 28th, 2012 04:45 am (UTC)
Adorable, and so in character. Ah, Sherlock, you scallywag.
The Writer They Call Tay: SHERLOCK: Watson's cute noseawanderingbard on November 29th, 2012 04:41 pm (UTC)
Thank you very much! I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for commenting!